The Hero’s Journey
Some call it an awakening, others getting on the path. My preference is to call it my journey. I was reflecting earlier this morning about all the twists and turns that it’s taken to get me to where I am now.
I’ve done some reading in the Hero’s Journey. Mythologist Joseph Campbell outlined the archetypal storyline that has stood the test of time. From traditional myths handed down across the ages, told by story tellers sitting around a campfire, to modern day cinematic storytelling, they all follow a similar arc.
The Hero is called to adventure, the hero ignores the call, the call gets louder until it can’t be ignored, then reluctantly the hero begins. He leaves the safety and comfort of his known world to face and fight his demons, and eventually conquering them, returns home to a hero’s welcome where he shares what he has learned.
But rather than a mythical journey, what if the Hero’s Journey describes our own path of waking up to who we are and what we are capable of?
At 18 I had a plan. I was going to join the military, spend at least 20 years and then? Nothing really, I didn’t much have a plan for beyond 20 years, it was too far off into the distance, but something would turn up. By the time I was 22 I had a very different view of the world. I was out of the military and had no real idea what direction to take in life. I do remember asking some existential questions though. What are we here for and what was the point of life? Just the easy ones.
I didn’t get any answers, so I did what everyone else said to do. I knuckled down and got to work and did my best to get ahead in life. By my standards at the time, I made progress. Promotion, new skills, chosen to move with the company I worked for to another country, more promotions and lots of experiences, but I never found that coveted long term satisfaction and happiness I was hoping for. It always seemed somewhere off in the distance, perhaps it would come with a bigger house, a new car, more expensive gadgets, or a new relationship, where I could truly express myself.
I followed the standard plan, working hard to get ahead, being diligent, saving, buying the right things until I was 35, after which time it all came apart at the seams. There had been signs, I was unhappy, unhealthy and my life was getting chaotic. I now know this is a sign that I had ignored the signs too long.
Looking back now that all seems like madness, but I can also see it was all part of my own hero’s journey. Like most people, I don’t consider myself a hero at all, but it is my story. Something within me tried to wake me up to other possibilities in my early 20’s, but I would suggest at the time I wasn’t ready to go in search of the answers I was looking for. All that changed in my mid 30’s when the call to change my path got too loud to ignore. And while I would like to say I strode of valiantly to fight my demons; it was more of a case I waited till they overwhelmed me, and I couldn’t ignore them anymore.
We’ve all heard of the midlife crisis in whatever shape it takes. Mine had lots of endings and slow beginnings as I started to rebuild. Most of that rebuilding was my self-concept, and it’s still evolving to this day, as I strip away beliefs that no longer support who I want to be, and what is left feels more authentic and genuine.
Which brings me full circle to this morning’s reflection of some of the things I’ve done throughout my life, some good, some cringeworthy. While I can’t change the past, whether good, bad or cringeworthy, what occurred to me is that they were all attempts at finding out a bit more about myself with real-time feedback from the world letting me know whether or not I’d had a hit or miss.
While my story is mine, I’ve spoken with enough other people to know there is a common thread. At some stage here is a reckoning, a siren call that we have to answer. When that time comes, we have to stop looking out in the world for validation and start the journey of discovering who we are.
And while this may not seem relevant, our deepest held goals, the ones we secretly fear we will never accomplish, these are the closest thing to an expression of who we are and what we desire for ourselves and can serve as a catalyst for that journey.
